Perspective: Part 2

So here I am. Now what? Well, Perspective, that's what.

I am so blessed for this entire ordeal. I know it sounds hokey or at the least a good public service announcement but it's true. Sure, would it have been awesome to never have had this issue in the first place? Yea. While I'm at it why don't I turn the clock back to 2010 before the hamstring tendinopathy kicked in? Or even better still, 2008 when I tore my plantar fasciitis in the steeplechase instead of qualifying for the Beijing Olympics? Yea, of course that could have been the path I walked but it isn't. The other paths that I didn't walk, though, also include never having been to the Olympics at all, having a terminal illness instead of this "elective" surgery, or not having the amazing support network of family and friends that I do.

Starting to see it? That's Perspective. I would like to get back to running competitively and even go after the qualifying standard for Rio 2016. But you know what, when this started (before the myopathy) I used to look at the girls I used to race against and think, "Darn, why can't I be competing? This sucks!" Then, as time went on and I stopped running, I would look at the overweight person trotting along the street trying to stick to a healthy training regimen and think, "Wow, good for him! I hope, I can go running one day (that's right just regular, ol' go-out-for-a-run-because-it-just-feels-good running)." Over these months I've gained perspective.

When I first flew to Houston to see Dr. Brown it mattered to me that he was an athlete specialist - and it still does of course. But as the months progressed and I was showing up in hospitals regularly for tests, I would see people much sicker than I and with much more serious issues to consider than "can I make it to the next Olympics". That's perspective.

I really want to stress and point out that I don't feel bad at all about looking inward and getting caught up in the bubble that surrounds me that is my life. My issues are important to me and that matters. I don't have to cure world hunger to feel important. I don't have to feel ashamed for looking inward and crying when things don't go my way or I can't run. I don't have to excuse my ego, my vanity, or my obsessions.

This perspective thing is just a way that helps me cope with challenges better. It helps me to realize that on the road to pursuing your dreams there are going to be setbacks. Things won't always go your way and, for better or worse, they might not go your way at all.  You still put you head down (βάζεις το κεφάλι κάτω) and work your tail off pursuing your goals...but every so often it is good to look up and realize that there is more to life.

This time away from running gave me the chance to spend even more quality time with my family and to build on the great relationship I have with my nephews. I even got a job as office manager for a great startup, PopWi, and I am busy sharpening my dormant office skills. I realize that there is more to enjoy in life than just running, but don't get me wrong...I'm hitting the roads with my running shoes June 12 and if I only make it 1mile that will be my first mile on the road to Rio!

Perspective: Part 1

I know it has been nearly two years since I've written and a lot has happened over that time. I wish I could say that I've been basking in the post-Olympic glow but unfortunately that hasn't been the case. I'm actually drafting this blog entry up with a bit of post-surgery glow (thank you morphine)! I just had a total thyroidectomy and am recovering but the path to today has been a challenge for me so I'll rewind just a bit.

After the Olympics, I took time off to recover physically and psychologically. Fortunately, my desire and drive came back after a bit and I started running and enjoying it again. But it didn't take long for me to notice that I wasn't quite myself. I thought perhaps I was still burnt out so I trained at more moderate intensities and volume to let my body ease into things. Things would look up and I would have great training sessions and then, inevitably, I would go on runs that felt like I was running through lava. Of course, I didn't think to look into to a broader reason than I was probably washed up, too old, or just unmotivated. In July 2013, things came to a head when upon my return to Athens after a great training camp in Karpenisi my legs start burning. Literally feeling like they are getting cooked from the inside out! Well, that led me to seriously look into what I thought was just a borderline hyperthyroidism that first gave me heart palpitations and other symptoms in 2011. Overtime things worsened and a myopathic condition developed that has prevented me from running for the past 5 months.

After a series of blood tests, ultrasounds, biopsies, and  a radioactive scan over the course of the last 10 months, here I am recovering at Stanford Hospital having gotten rid of a multinodular goiter and a "hot" nodule (no I didn't look like a supermodel while I had it).

Before I move on, I have to send many, many thanks to many, many people and not in order of appearance. First, I would like to say thank you to my surgeon, Dr. Holsinger, and really every last person I've come into contact with at Stanford Hospital & Clinics, for treating me like royalty from my very first office visit just last week (although I am sure everyone is privy to the customer service fit for a queen). The wound is still fresh but I can talk (vocal cords can sometimes be affected) and I can still move my muscles (parathyroid glands responsible for regulating your calcium levels also require quite a bit of finesse) so the surgery was definitely a success! Thank you to Adrianna El Calamawy (Stanford) and Dr. Weiss (The Village Doctor, Woodside) for all of your time and efforts in making this happen in record time. Thank you to Dr. Jeffrey Brown in Houston, my endocrinologist who spearheaded the effort in diagnosing the problem and was always available for me even two time zones a part! And to my family who is always by my side and my nephews who make me see the world through the eyes of children - which we should all do every so often.

I notice that this entry is already quite long (I'm going to blame it on the morphine) so please read Perspective: Part 2 when you have time and desire to find out what I learned from all this.